Ramblings from Lady Rosalie and her guests...concerning new releases, life as a published writer and general stuff...
Hi Lindsay, welcome to my blog. Congratulations on the release of Unveiling His Princess and thanks for being here today.
Pushing away from him, she caught up her skirts. “I beg your pardon, Bennett, but I really must go.”Point of view can make or break a story. Used well, the character driven pov can create empathy with the reader, showing them the world as the main character views it. They will live and breath the main character's adventure, feel their pain, share their successes. For me it is the most fun. In truth I am still learning how to polish this pov, but I really enjoy trying to involve every sense as I 'see' the world through my character's eyes.
Third person character narration, or character driven pov, allows the character to think about things and in doing so the reader gains an intimacy with the main character. They experience their inner turmoil, their angst, their elation or despair. Writing Fantasy it is important to create a world that the reader can relate to. We are removed from what is familiar and the reader relies on the writer to give them enough information to complete the illusion. Always remember to allow your character to experience all the sensory stimulii possible. This is shared with the reader. Within character driven pov the information can be conveyed in various ways. Writers can choose to use 'internal monologue narration', a style that conveys the story as if the character is telling it.
An example of Internal monologue narration. With the reader inside the main character's head.
Stryder threw open the door, stumbled inside and looked around. How had he forgotten her bewitching wiles?
Or they can use 'Internal dialogue narration', (as opposed to monologue) Let's see...
Stryder threw open the door, stumbled inside and looked around. How did I forget her bewitching wiles?
When writing a scene, it is best to keep to the one pov. To begin with an omniscient intrusive pov (god like) (where the reader is told what everyone is thinking or feeling) and then close in to a character driven pov just doesn't work. It is called head hopping and is one reason a manuscript will be rejected. Jumping from one character to another within a scene is also head hopping and a big 'no no'. If you must change characters, change scene or chapter. There should at least be a double spaced paragraph between POV changes. If possible maintain the single pov for a chapter.
I read recently that it is 'ok' for pov changes in times of conflict. I don't know. I think it shows the author isn't trying. That's my opinion.
Another rule to remember when choosing a pov to use is to tell the story from the point of view of the character with the most to lose or gain from the scene. You might find though that if you have a character that the reader is following, breaking from their POV shatters the focus. I re wrote a novel that followed three main characters. Now it follows one. From reader's reactions it works well now. Sacrificing so many words seemed almost painful at one stage, but I have learnt so much since the book was written. I would be wrong not to incorporate new information wouldn't I? Writing and re writing.. honing our skills. That's what it is all about, isn’t it?
Poor POV and Passive writing both distance the reader from the action. Learning to avoid these two pitfalls should sharpen your writing. Seeing the same mistakes in others is often easier than correcting your own work, but once you are aware of the problems and how to overcome them you will find you notice them as you write. At least, that is what I have found.
Good luck and keep writing.
The secret to dragging a reader into a story and immersing them in the Fantasy world is to master at least one Point of View. The Character driven POV is useful to the writer when they need to include the reader in the action.
Now Point of View and Passive writing can actually cause the same problems. The problem is distancing the reader. So using a POV that works and that a writer is confident with can make the difference between a winning story and a yawn.
If the author does not succeed in describing, filling the reader's imagination, or giving enough information to keep them turning pages, it can often be due to a failure in using a workable POV.
An author should avoid at all costs anything that separates the reader from the POV character. Editing for this error is difficult. It means finding any instance where the author has backed away from the main character.
A useful analogy is to think of a cameraman filming a scene. To begin the shoot the camera angle would be wide lens giving an overview for the audience. Once established the camera would close in. Zooming in to focus on the characters and create empathy with them. As the scene continues the camera can be used to create tension, conflict or to establish how the main character is feeling. It is only able to relate what is SEEN or what the character believes. The camera cannot tell what other characters are thinking. Neither can the main character when using this POV. If a camera cannot SEE a thought, neither can the character. To suddenly read minds is to change POV and will distance the reader.
It is important with character driven POV to only reveal the thoughts and reactions of the main character. Actions and emotions of other characters can be described as if seen by the main character, but they must be interpreted through the main character's eyes.
When the narrator intrudes on the story, imposing their own thoughts or beliefs the reader is suddenly distanced. They no longer have the intimacy of being inside the main character's head, they are suddenly being told what is happening. This is called Author Intrusive narration.
There are many different types of POV. For example in fiction, writers are able to use: effaced omniscient narrator, limited omniscient narrator, restrictive omniscient narrator or third person character narrator. The temptation to write in first person also exists, First person POV has several styles all of its own.
I have trouble with POV. Hence the length of the discussion here. Trying to understand the various different styles, gives me a headache. Reading published authors who seem to head hop or change POV confuses me. I have tried to master the character driven pov. I don't know that I have managed to as yet, but readers comment that they feel as though they are involved and in the story, so I guess that's a good sign.
Good luck and keep writing.
Have you ever wondered how to avoid this simple problem? These simple steps can help avoid falling into the common trap of using too much passive voice.
When editing for Passive Voice it is time to seek out and replace the most common passive voice VERBS.
Using 'find' in Word docs is one simple way. Going through your ms with a red pen is another. Which ever way you choose, the time spent is worthwhile.
First, look for the two worst offenders, 'WAS' and 'WERE'. Where these occur try to replace them, even if it means re writing the sentence. One helpful bit of advice I was given was to try to describe what is happening in terms that can be illustrated.
For example.. I have used this before, so bear with me... "He was angry." Try to describe his anger. How did the viewer know he was angry. His face grew red, his teeth ground, his pulserate quickened. His temper frayed. etc.
"They were alone" Here there is a great opportunity to address all the senses. Don't just rely on sight.. What can the subject hear, or what doesn't the subject hear... or smell or feel that helps describe their isolation?
Ok, once you begin to find those pesky WAS and WERE verbs, it is time to go further and seek out and destroy examples of static verbs (other forms of the verb TO BE) such as: am, is, are, be, being, been. Then we have the dreaded..had, have, has, do, did, does, and we finish with the threesome, could, should and would.
You will have already begun to find your writing is stronger and more impressive as you learn to replace these lazy verbs with more aggressive, descriptive verbs.
It doesn't end there. Look for any instances where you might have over used got, get, went, and put.
That's enough for now. If there are any questions, please contact me. It sounds straight forward, but there are times when even these simple solutions become confusing. Remember 'all things in moderation.'
Keep writing.
Words To Avoid
The successful Fantasy author needs to know the words to avoid and how to find adequate replacements. Here are some hints and tips to help the writer when polishing their Fantasy novel.
Creative writers always try to avoid adverbs. Adverbs usually end in ‘ly’ and are words that add meaning to a verb.
Example:
Walk slowly. Run quickly. Speak softly. Gently touch. Shout loudly.
Comment:
There are better ways to say the same thing. Find stronger verbs to replace these.
Better:
Stroll. Sprint. Whisper. Caress. Yell.
Resist the temptation to add adverbs to dialogue tags. Beware of saying things twice.
Example:
He snarled angrily. She whispered softly. He yawned sleepily.
Comment:
Note how the adverb isn’t needed.
Snarl demonstrates anger. The adverb isn’t needed.
She whispered softly. Whispered indicates softly spoken.
He yawned sleepily. Yawned is indicative of being tired.
Other Words to Avoid
Had. That. Up. Down. Really. Almost. Just. So.
These words are used without thought, but often do little to improve a sentence. When a Fantasy author is polishing their manuscript, they should go through and remove any case where these words are unnecessary.
‘Had’ places the action in the past. ‘That’ is often unnecessary. To bring immediacy to their writing a Fantasy authors will strive to keep action and interest in the present.
Up and down are often added when not needed. Really, unless in dialogue is unnecessary. Almost, again is not acceptable unless in dialogue, since the narrator should know things. ‘Almost’ is indecisive and will frustrate the reader. He was almost as tall. He’s shorter. She could almost see… again she couldn’t see.
Just and so are just so superfluous.
Example:
The damsel had watched the villain leap up onto the horse that had been tied up to the hitching rail outside the tavern.
The damsel was really frightened, watching the fire that almost burned the tavern down. She thought it was just so lucky no one that had been in the inn was hurt.
Comment:
This is a bit obvious, but the idea is clear. Remove all the words that should be avoided. See how to improve poor writing by culling words we tend to ignore as we write.
Better:
The damsel watched the villain leap onto the horse tied to the hitching rail outside the tavern.
The damsel was frightened, watching the fire burn the tavern. She thought it was lucky no one in the inn was hurt.
Comment:
Another cull and sentence rewrite can improve this example.
Example:
The damsel watched the villain leap onto the horse tied outside the tavern.
As the tavern burned, she shook with fright. Relief washed over her when no one in the inn was hurt. Her thudding heart quieted and trembling limbs stilled.
Comment:
This example has tried to ‘show’ the reader how she felt rather than ‘tell’ them.
‘She was frightened’, is telling. ‘She thought it was lucky’, is telling.
The words to avoid that will prevent the author falling into the ‘telling’ not ‘showing’ trap are: felt, thought, saw, and was.
The Fantasy author, when writing in third limited omniscient should try to ‘see’ action and gauge emotions in characters and scenes from what their main character can see and understand. They will use gestures and mannerisms, as well as dialogue to give the reader insight.
Try this exercise yourself. Have a list of words you want to avoid and keep adding to it as you master the craft of writing. Soon they will disappear from your manuscript and your writing will become stronger, compelling and more attractive to a publisher.
